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35 People Share Passive Aggressive Gibberish Phrases That Almost Everyone Uses In Their Workplace

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“As per my last e-mail.” “A few things…” “While I understand your urgency…” If you recognize any of these, you’re probably familiar with office language. It’s clunky. It’s repetitive. But once you become fluent at it, you start noticing little nuances that make it a bit more exciting. Like the passive-aggressive phrases people throw at each other to make life harder than it should be.

Recently, writer, producer, and social media consultant Delia Paunescu asked Twitter to list the best/most insufferable work gibberish, and holy coffee-machine-small-talk, did everyone deliver! Scroll down to check them out and upvote your faves!

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The confusing maze of office lingo is one of the reasons why an estimated 2.9 billion people of the 3 billion who go to work every day of avoid making small talk with their colleagues. However, this can cost them a promotion.

Jamie Terran, a licensed career coach in New York City, told The New York Times that small talk between colleagues and supervisors builds rapport, which in turn builds trust. “Rapport is the feeling that allows you to extend a deadline, or overlook smaller mistakes, because it makes it easy for you to remember we’re only human. Right or wrong, building rapport through interaction with colleagues could be the thing that gets you the promotion or keeps you in the role you’re in.”

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10 hours ago

Well, regardless of that, it sounds indeed like a very anxiety inducing working environment….

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Luckily, turning your anxiety about making small talk with your co-workers into worrying about not making small talk with your co-workers is definitely possible. Of course, it’s easier said than done, but we have to understand that while small talk can be a nightmare, the lack of it can make us miserable as well. I mean, isn’t the ability to truly connect with a fellow team member, one that can really understand your daily struggles, something worth working for? Especially when you consider that failure to do so can get you kicked out when the time comes for someone to get sacked. Just some food for thought!

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12 hours ago

= I don’t care

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12 hours ago

When my husband started working he wondered why the person in the room next to him would send an email for something small instead of just walking two steps and ask or tell in person. After a few incidents where people insisted he never told them about something he now does this all the time himself, just to have proof he did actually tell something…

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13 hours ago

Once I forwarded some company bills to accounting BO,after that they asked me to help about some lost bills in person.Went up, accounting staff there,and I told the one I forwarded the mail beforehand that she has them there. Asks me back where. I had to tell her in front of everyone,that since it’s not MY email we are looking at,but hers,she should now it. I had to look for the title from my messages on my phone,to help her find it among her emails….it was already read. 😒 From that on, accounting BO believes me when I say I already sent them something. 🙃

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11 hours ago

I’m currently on a project where the developers and planners have the policy, that every mail needs to be sent to everyone remotely involved on the topic and you can’t even change the distribution when you answer. So e.g. 35 people get even the “Thank you” answers to any small topic.

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12 hours ago

..Cause I spent 2 hours preparing this quote for you and you did not even dare to say thanks for this offer during the past week …

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12 hours ago

Usually, I keep this way when they own me money, but clearly want to yell at them

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8 hours ago

I use it more like „there is respect, but not because you earned it but because I have to respect you or else I have no job“.

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12 hours ago

I’ve worked with people who will send something at 4.45pm and say “I need this for a customer meeting at 9 tomorrow”. If you help them once, then they never need to be organised ever again, because they have their patsy. “I’m sorry, but I have a [insert important-sounding appointment] that I just can’t miss” works well, followed up with “for future reference, I really need more notice”. They don’t like it, but they usually learn from it.

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12 hours ago

I love ‘thanks in advance’ – I use it in so many more occasions than just the office haha

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12 hours ago

Great exposure!

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7 hours ago

How is this passive aggressive? Sometimes the question literally takes 2 seconds to ask. Are there people that really think this has a deeper meaning?

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10 hours ago

Oh this is a good one, I’m using it today! I didn’t know how to say ‘I don’t understand your words’ politely

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3 hours ago

Raise your hand if “Hope that helps!” ever has.

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5 hours ago

I used to have a boss with the most appalling memory. Did use it once to my advantage by pretending I’d told him something and as he was the worst boss I only feel slightly guilty. His fault in part for never writing things down. He used to think we were still in the 70s during the 90s.

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7 hours ago

Answer: If you need a recap, I suggets you write it and send it to me for approval.

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3 hours ago

I use this one all the time in discussions with management. Because I know the policies better than they do, most times.

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8 hours ago

I used to do this when working from home, in the other room making coffee until they ask me something. *runs back* “Oh sorry, was talking on mute the whole time”

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3 hours ago

I recall this differently, or…stop lying!

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6 hours ago

HA!!

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11 hours ago

A good boss delegates.

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5 hours ago

Sometimes I’m crap at explaining. So I have written this and meant it.

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7 hours ago

We were actually told to hire the CEO’s nephew right from the start, but had to go through the motions of pretending to open the position to everyone.”

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4 hours ago

I mean it sincerely when I say this, not passive aggressively.

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7 hours ago

Or: “Here’s a massive problem that I have created. Good luck with it.”

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